A Balanced Life
By Our world seems in great turmoil. The United States appears to be challenged by nations with very different political and social objectives. Various outlets blast us with repetitive information about these concerns, and we are left to try to determine what really happened. We are potentially available to others and other groups via cell phones and computers 24/7. The nature of our profession is many times adversarial and too often becomes combative. The desire to be successful, have lots of clients and to win can easily blind our sensibility. Obligations to our families and friends can become a weight on our lives.
It can be said that these are all realities of life and as responsible adults and we should cope with these issues.
The electronic tools used in the practice of law today can isolate us. In that situation, it is very possible to feel alone and allow negative feelings and attitudes to creep into our lives and perspectives. Though we may be members of firms or have friends and colleagues who would serve as sounding boards or resources, we often are afraid and ashamed to admit we have a problem or do not have all the answers.
Recent articles published by the American Bar Association, the North Carolina Bar Association and the North Carolina State Bar have indicated that a substantial number of lawyers are unhappy with themselves and their lives. This unhappiness can be reflected in high levels of depression, drug and alcohol abuse, and destructive acting out in individual’s lives. So, what do we do?
The first step is to acknowledge there is a problem. This sounds easy or simple. Too often, it is not. Denial is a core issue in emotional and psychological problems. This first step is the most difficult. As friends or professional colleagues, we need to be willing to take considerate and constructive steps to help friends and colleagues to receive proper help and support. How do we do this?
The Lawyer Assistance Program and the BarCares program offer free and confidential assistance to talk with professionals concerning pressing problems. The Lawyer Assistance Program telephone number is (704) 910-2310. The BarCARES program telephone number is (800) 640-0735. Professionals are available to guide us with our individual problems or assistance us is getting friends and colleagues to use these excellent resources. Another group willing to assist in these efforts is the Chief Justice’s Commission on Professionalism. The commission will reach out to lawyers in trouble and work to help them to deal with their problem and redirect themselves and their work in a positive, meaningful direction. The commission’s number is (919)890-1455. Using any of these resources can be the best thing you may have done.
When I began my practice of law, I was so fortunate to have experienced and wise mentors to help me in my practice. Wonderful friends continue to assist and support me today. I would not be the lawyer and individual I am without the gracious gifts of these individuals’ wisdom and shared experiences. These individuals have been invaluable in my life. There are times and circumstances in each of our lives that we need perspective and guidance. I encourage you to assist young lawyers, friends and colleagues in navigating the practice of law and life.
In other writings, the Bar Association and State Bar emphasize the need to take time for us and those we care about. The demands of practice can make this challenging. Taking time to exercise and do things we enjoy will release and counter the stresses and pressures of our work and busy lives. As the saying goes, you cannot always make up time. Time spent with family and friends will bring needed happiness and joy.
Like many other things, a balanced life requires commitment. By taking the time to assess our lives, constantly working to positively improve and taking necessary time for ourselves and for others in challenging times, our lives will be healthy and much happier. A balanced life is an essential goal for all of us.